Andy lost his mojo

Have you seen American Express' new promo for the U.S. Open? Andy Roddick goes to bed, but his mojo rises from his body and takes his AmEx card out for a night on the town. The next morning, Andy struggles in practice as his mojo continues to roam the city, card in hand. Will Andy's mojo return, the commercial asks, or is the pull of the AmEx card too much?

Talk about bad karma. Roddick was upset last night in the first freakin' round of the only major he's previously won, and by the 69th-ranked player in the world. He was serving for the first set at 5-4, pulled an incredible tank job, and went on to lose the match 6-7, 6-7, 6-7. Guess his mojo never came back. Just give Federer the trophy now.

In other sports news, it's been reported in the LA Times that Michelle Wie will sign with the William Morris Agency, thus ending her amateur career. The agency offered her guaranteed money and cut its commission to nothing, and it's believed she'll initially be worth $10-12 million a year. That number would likely go up if/when she enjoys success and starts to draw endorsements outside of the golf mainstream. Given that she would have finished 11th on the money list this year through sponsor's exemptions alone (7 tournaments), her success is a mortal lock.

It's hard to blame her for not wanting to pass up that kind of money, and it's somewhat surprising that she's held out this long, but it will be disappointing to miss out on seeing her play for the Cardinal men's team, which was one of her dreams and would have been very cool if allowed. Now it's onto the LPGA tour, and if she dominates like Tiger, I may actually watch a final round or two.

A couple of things to watch for this weekend:

• U$C kicks off its quest for a threepeat in Honolulu, against the UH Warriors. Go 'Bows! Gina is pretty bummed to have to miss this one, since she'll be in SoCal for Eddy's wedding. Nice planning, Eddy. Sheesh.
  
  
• The U.S. men's soccer team faces Mexico in World Cup qualifying, and the winner clinches a berth in the final draw for Germany '06, though both will easily make it. I know a lot of folks don't "get" soccer (the passion, the creativity...only Jeremy gets this joke), but the U.S. team is now rated #6 in the FIFA World Rankings, its highest ranking ever. Pretty soon, we will have a legitimate contender to root for, if we don't already. Saturday's game ought to be entertaining (Mexico is #5 in the rankings).
  
  
• And finally, in WNBA playoff news...

Draft Analysis

Saturday was They Speak English in What? draft day, the highlight of the fantasy football season! All of the general managers were in attendance for the big event. How did they do? The following is my evaluation of the winners and losers of each round, as well as a look at the big questions that loom as the season approaches.

Round 1 - No big surprises. Running backs are at a premium in our league, and the top eight on the board are all taken in the first round.

1. L. Tomlinson - Triple 20 (Andrew)
2. P. Holmes - Bacon Tastes Good (Scott)
3. S. Alexander - Confused (Lisa)
4. E. James - Rapscallions (Dan)
5. C. Dillon - G Dogz (Gina)
6. W. McGahee - Whoosh (Jeremy)
7. D. McAllister - Loco Moco (Hubert)
8. J. Lewis - Porkchops Taste Good (Chang)

Best Pick: Jamal Lewis. Great running back + terrible quarterback + great defense = 2,000 yards. The Ravens' passing game stinks, but they will be in every game because of their defense, which means lots of rushes for Jamal, who has proven that he can gain huge yardage without a viable passing game. He thrives on eight in the box. He's strong enough to break through to the second level and fast enough to run clear once he gets there.

Worst Pick: No one. Barring injuries, all eight of these guys should clear 1,600 total yards and 16 total touchdowns. History tells us some won't make it, but at this point, they all look good.

Big Question: How will Willis McGahee handle eight in the box this year? J.P. Losman doesn't scare anyone, so defenses will be looking to stop McGahee. Will he be another Jamal, or another Portis?

Round 2 - Manning is still available!

9. D. Davis - Porkchops Taste Good
10. P. Manning - Loco Moco
11. R. Moss - Whoosh
12. M. Harrison - G Dogz
13. K. Jones - Rapscallions
14. R. Johnson - Confused
15. J. Jones - Bacon Tastes Good
16. C. Portis - Triple 20

Best Pick: Peyton Manning. Despite the premium on running backs, most of us still figured Peyton would go in the first round. The guy threw 49 touchdown passes last year. He's probably good for another 40 this year. Julius Jones at 15 is also very good value. Coach Parcells loves the running game.

Worst Pick: Clinton Portis. He was a great running back in Denver, but so was Olandis Gary. In his first year in Washington, he had a 3.8 yards-per-carry average (versus 5.5 in two years with Denver). His o-line is marginal, and he faces a lot of eight-man fronts. In Denver, his o-line was one of the best in the league, and he never faced eight-man fronts. He'll still gain plenty of yards because the Redskins' passing game stinks so badly, but with that kind of average, he won't be seeing the endzone much.

Big Question: Will Moss' numbers be hurt by going from Culpepper to Collins? Probably not. In fact, his numbers usually went up when he played with scrubs like Gus Frerotte or Jeff George, because they were more likely to panic and throw it up for grabs in Moss' direction than properly run through their check-downs. But change is change, so we'll see what happens.

Round 3 - Attention, Andrew! TO is still one the board! Oops...too late.

17. T. Holt - Triple 20
18. T. Owens - Bacon Tastes Good
19. D. Culpepper - Confused
20. T. Barber - Rapscallions
21. B. Westbrook - G Dogz
22. S. Jackson - Whoosh
23. A. Green - Loco Moco
24. C. Johnson - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Ahman Green. This guy was the consensus #3 overall pick last year. Injuries slowed him down last year, but they can slow anyone down in a given year. Talent-wise, and in Green Bay's offense, he's a top ten fantasy back. I was sad to just miss out on him.

Worst Pick: Torry Holt. Just because Andrew didn't realize that TO was still on the board. Torry will still put up solid numbers and is nothing to be sad about.

Big Question: How much will TO's preseason antics affect his regular season numbers? If his first preseason game was any indication, not much.

Round 4 - The top-tier tight ends both come off the board, though I don't think I'm happy to get one of them.

25. T. Gonzalez - Porkchops Taste Good
26. L. Jordan - Loco Moco
27. C. Martin - Whoosh
28. D. Brees - G Dogz
29. A. Johnson - Rapscallions
30. J. Walker - Confused
31. A. Gates - Bacon Tastes Good
32. R. Wayne - Triple 20

Best Pick: Andre Johnson. I'm kicking myself for not taking him at 25. He's Carr's favorite target, great on the goalline, and just starting to hit his prime.

Worst Pick: Drew Brees. He should put up solid numbers, but he likely would have been available in a much later round. Trent Green didn't go until round 9! And is Drew better than Donovan?

Big Question: Is Lamont Jordan a lead back? Magic 8-Ball says...outlook hazy.

Round 5 - So many quarterbacks left! Could it be that people saw me win the championship last year with Billy Freakin' Volek and realized they aren't that important?

33. T. Bell - Triple 20
34. J. Horn - Bacon Tastes Good
35. H. Ward - Confused
36. W. Dunn - Rapscallions
37. D. Jackson - G Dogz
38. D. McNabb - Whoosh
39. N. Burleson - Loco Moco
40. A. Boldin - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Donovan McNabb. Now that TO is back, McNabb is a nice pick-up in Round 5.

Worst Pick: Tatum Bell. Blecch. Too early to take a chance on a guy who might eventually be a starter. There were too many other clear #1 RB's still available.

Big Question: Who is Warner's number one target, Boldin or Fitzgerald? Please be Boldin, please be Boldin, please be Boldin...

Round 6 - The first rookie is off the board.

41. M. Anderson - Porkchops Taste Good
42. C. Williams - Loco Moco
43. Ro. Williams - Whoosh
44. K. Barlow - G Dogz
45. M. Bulger - Rapscallions
46. D. Foster - Confused
47. M. Vick - Bacon Tastes Good
48. Mi. Clayton - Triple 20

Best Pick: Mike Anderson. The starting Broncos running back can always be counted on for huge numbers, no matter who it is. Terrell Davis, Olandis Gary, Mike Anderson, Clinton Portis, Quentin Griffin, Rueben Droughns. And this year, it's Anderson again. In his last season as the starter, his rookie year, he had 1,700 total yards and 15 touchdowns. In his most recent preseason game, he had 130 yards and 2 touchdowns. In the first half. Okay, it was against Indianapolis, and it was only the preseason, and most of the yards came on one run. But for a 6th rounder, Anderson is a steal.

Worst Pick: Michael Vick. Most exciting player in the league. Check. Leads his team to victories. Check. Gains an inordinate number of rushing yards for a quarterback. Check. But he has only 49 total touchdowns in 43 games! That is terrible for fantasy. And he's a turnover machine. Maybe this is his breakout year, but that's hard to fathom considering the Falcon's playing style. And I know of what I speak. I've been the sucker to draft him the last two years.

Big Question: How much of the load is DeShaun Foster going to carry? At this point, it looks like he'll be sharing pretty evenly with Stephen Davis.

Round 7 - The first defense gets taken.

49. J. Arrington - Triple 20
50. F. Taylor - Bacon Tastes Good
51. A. Crumpler - Confused
52. S. Smith - Rapscallions
53. J. Witten - G Dogz
54. Baltimore - Whoosh
55. L. Coles - Loco Moco
56. D. Bennett - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Jason Witten. Surrounded by a marginal receiving corps, Witten is good for 1,000 yards and a lot of goalline opportunities. He's the reason I'm kicking myself for taking Tony G instead of Andre Johnson in the 4th round. If I had known that Witten would last this long, I wouldn't have reached for a tight end so early, not even for Gonzo.

Worst Pick: Baltimore. Clearly the #1 fantasy defense, but no one was ready to take a defense yet anyway, so why not pick up another wide receiver or running back?

Big Question: Can Fred Taylor stay healthy? If so, Scott got himself a huge, huge steal.

Round 8 - Gina hasn't drafted Lelie?

57. T. Jones - Porkchops Taste Good
58. A. Lelie - Loco Moco
59. J. Shockey - Whoosh
60. M. Muhammad - G Dogz
61. R. Brown - Rapscallions
62. J. Porter - Confused
63. Atlanta - Bacon Tastes Good
64. L. Fitzgerald - Triple 20

Best Pick: Muhsin Muhammad. He was the top fantasy wide receiver last year. He obviously won't be this year, but he'll be Kyle Orton's favorite (only?) target, and at least the Bears finally came to their senses and realized what I realized my freshman year at Stanford: Hutchinson stinks.

Worst Pick: Atlanta. Still too early for a defense, especially after Baltimore was already taken.

Big Question: With Cedric Benson finally getting into camp, how much will he eat into Thomas Jones' playing time? Damn it, why couldn't Benson just sit out the whole year?!

Round 9

65. E. Johnson - Triple 20
66. C. Chambers - Bacon Tastes Good
67. K. Collins - Confused
68. T. Green - Rapscallions
69. New England - G Dogz
70. P. Burress - Whoosh
71. Pittsburgh - Loco Moco
72. D. Driver - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Eric Johnson. With Tim Rattay back as the starter, Johnson's value goes way up. Rattay loves Johnson. Donald Driver is also a solid pickup in the 9th round.

Worst Pick: Plaxico Burress. As I wrote before, change is change, so maybe this change will be good for him. I'll keep an open mind.

Big Question: What will Randy Moss mean for Kerry Collins' numbers? I'm predicting good things.

Round 10 - Gina gets her Rainbow Warrior.

73. Carolina - Porkchops Taste Good
74. T. Heap - Loco Moco
75. L. Evans - Whoosh
76. J. Elam - G Dogz
77. M. Hasselbeck - Rapscallions
78. Indianapolis - Confused
79. A. Vinatieri - Bacon Tastes Good
80. C. Palmer - Triple 20

Best Pick: Matt Hasselbeck. He's a proven quarterback, and he lasted a surprisingly long time.

Worst Pick: Adam Vinatieri. Okay, we all know why Gina picked Elam this round, but why in the world did Scott pick Vinatieri this early? I guess Gina's pick messed with his head.

Big Question: Will Carson Palmer show huge improvement over a shaky first year? The way he finished last season, things look promising. Pass to Chad Johnson a lot, please!

Round 11

81. T. Brady - Triple 20
82. A. Brooks - Bacon Tastes Good
83. D. Akers - Confused
84. I. Bruce - Rapscallions
85. C. Brown - G Dogz
86. L. Johnson - Whoosh
87. B. Favre - Loco Moco
88. J. Delhomme - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Brett Favre. How does a guy coming off a 4,000 yard/30 touchdown season last this long? Great backup for Peyton Manning.

Worst Pick: David Akers. Still way too early for kickers.

Big Question: Will Jake Delhomme be able to match his 3,900 yards and 30 touchdowns without Muhsin Muhammad? Hopefully Steve Smith's return will help Delhomme maintain the status quo.

Round 12

89. Tampa Bay - Porkchops Taste Good
90. J. Smith - Loco Moco
91. N. Davenport - Whoosh
92. R. Smith - G Dogz
93. J. Plummer - Rapscallions
94. Philadelphia - Confused
95. C. Benson - Bacon Tastes Good
96. T. Houshmandzadeh - Triple 20

Best Pick: Jimmy Smith. Nice job picking up a clear #1 wide receiver this late in the draft.

Worst Pick: T.J. Houshmandzadeh. Andrew already dropped him, so by definition, it was a wasted pick.

Big Question: I hate to be repetitive, but with Benson's late signing, how much playing time can we expect him to get? If he eventually takes over the #1 spot, he'll be a huge steal. If the best he does is break into a shared role with Jones, he won't be of much value. Neither will Jones.

Round 13 - The one where three defenses from the same state are chosen. Or, the one where two running backs from the same team are chosen.

97. J. Bettis - Triple 20
98. New York - Bacon Tastes Good
99. D. Staley - Confused
100. Buffalo - Rapscallions
101. New York - G Dogz
102. S. Moss - Whoosh
103. L. Smith - Loco Moco
104. S. McNair - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: L.J. Smith. He would be a solid starting tight end, but for Hubert he is merely an insurance policy against Todd Heap. The return of TO drops his value somewhat, but he's looked good in the preseason.

Worst Pick: The Steeler running backs. Both are gimpy, and neither will carry the load.

Big Question: Can Steve McNair return to his MVP form of 2003? He's finally healthy after suffering a string of nagging injuries last year, and now he has Norm Chow (agh, still painful) up in the booth calling the plays.

Round 14

105. R. McMichael - Porkchops Taste Good
106. R. Williams - Loco Moco
107. M. Vanderjagt - Whoosh
108. B. Leftwich - G Dogz
109. B. Griese - Rapscallions
110. C. Pennington - Confused
111. D. Graham - Bacon Tastes Good
112. J. Wilkins - Triple 20

Best Pick: Chad Pennington. Now that Laveranues Coles is back in New York and Pennington is healthy again, he should put up solid numbers for a backup quarterback in case Kerry Collins is a bust.

Worst Pick: Ricky Williams. He's useless for four weeks, and even when he gets back, the best he'll do is split time.

Big Question: Is anyone still reading? Will Ricky get traded to a team in need of a lead back? If so, I'll eat my "Worst Pick" words.

Round 15

113. E. Moulds - Triple 20
114. B. Edwards - Bacon Tastes Good
115. D. Branch - Confused
116. E. Kennison - Rapscallions
117. J. Wiggins - G Dogz
118. Seattle - Whoosh
119. S. Janikowski - Loco Moco
120. M. Robinson - Porkchops Taste Good

Best Pick: Braylon Edwards. At this point, you're looking for upside, and he has the most of anyone.

Worst Pick: Marcus Robinson. I already dropped him. What was I thinking? At least I replaced him with Derrick Mason, a #1 wide receiver, albeit for an awful quarterback.

Special mention goes to Andrew, who picked up a wide receiver in the second to last round despite not having picked up a single defense in a league that requires two.

Big Question: Will Sebastian Janikowski stay out of the police blotter? The Raiders will score plenty, but will he be kicking field goals or extra points?

Round 16 - Finally done! And I got my kicker!

121. R. Longwell - Porkchops Taste Good
122. Minnesota - Loco Moco
123. D. Blaylock - Whoosh
124. Cincinnati - G Dogz
125. D. Stallworth - Rapscallions
126. Da. Clark - Confused
127. L. Suggs - Bacon Tastes Good
128. Denver - Triple 20

Best Pick: Lee Suggs. A probable #1 running back with the second-to-last pick of the draft. Nicely done.

Worst Pick: Derrick Blaylock. Part of Jeremy's back-up running back strategy, but this one's the weakest of the bunch. And he could have had Suggs.

Big Question: Now that we made it to the end, how did the GM's grade out on this draft? Stay tuned for the follow-up!

Congrats to the World Champs!

I have had more than one reader express surprise that Gina hasn't blogged about the Hawaii Little Leaguers. I'm surprised, too! Don't worry, she went as nuts as you'd expect. She's just been a bit busy these days, particularly with the start of her second year of medical school today!

If you haven't heard, the team from Ewa Beach, Oahu, won the Little League World Series yesterday over defending champion Curacao, and they did it in extra innings! With a walk-off homerun! After trailing by 3 runs going into the final inning of regulation!

Michael Memea (left) hit the game-winner to give Hawaii its first ever LLWS champion.

As much as I enjoyed watching this scrappy bunch of kids (most of them diminutive Asians) pull off the improbable comeback, my favorite moment came in the third inning, when the umpire blew a call that turned a 1-1 game into a 3-1 game in favor of Curacao.

I immediately received a blistering, obscenity-laced phone call from Gina cursing the umpire. I didn't have much to say in response (it's best in those situations to just nod your head in agreement, even over the phone), but I remember thinking, "Boy, have I met my soulmate or what?" Is it any wonder that we have to watch in different rooms during Stanford/Hawaii volleyball games, or when our fantasy football teams go head to head? Yikes!

Sure makes it fun though! I'm sure I wouldn't have cared nearly as much about the outcome of this game had I not known that Gina was on the edge of her seat the entire time, cussing, screaming, and generally behaving in a manner consistent with my 6th-Man heyday.

Thankfully, the good guys won!

Weight transfer and wrist position

Those are the two things I learned from Joe DeBode, Shoreline Links' head golf pro, during my first golf lesson with Andrew and Hubert.

As I've mentioned before, my golf swing was learned from watching the pros on television and doing my best to mimic them. It allowed me to get down the basic construct, but I was missing the subtleties that generate power and height and keep the ball straight (minor details).

After watching my swing just once, Joe immediately identified two primary flaws. My weight was on the wrong foot on the backswing, so it wasn't transferring properly on the follow-through, and my left wrist was cupping too much on the backswing. The former caused poor ball contact and power loss, and the latter led to an open-faced club on impact, which caused the ball to shoot right of my aim almost every time.

Previously, I would address these issues by over-clubbing (driver on a par-freakin'-3) and aiming about 20 yards left of the actual target. But after just a few tips from Joe, my shots were consistently going farther and straighter. My 9-iron was finally clearing 100 yards!

The lesson was very good value. One hour, one instructor for just the three of us, and an unlimited amount of balls to hit: $25 each. Golf being fun again: priceless.

It's just a start, but it's great to see immediate progress and know that you are practicing the right things, as opposed to just reinforcing bad habits. Three more lessons, and we're heading to Stanford!

He can't be serious??

Charles Barkley is a jackass if he was serious in a debate with Bob Costas, Jon Stewart, and Al Leiter. He claims that Lance Armstrong, Tiger Woods, and Carl Lewis are not athletes but "are in great shape". What an idiot.

Video - Barkley on Costas Now

The conclusion to Monitor Madness

Final post on this, I promise.

The original inspiration for this infernal time-waster. I think our baseball bat picture compares favorably to most, but a few of these are really well done or particularly creative. Think we should submit ours?

To clarify for the confused, these photos are not the result of Photoshop machinations. They are unedited pictures of the actual monitor, placed to line up the desktop wallpaper with the background (and in our case, foreground).

The same cannot be said of Jeremy's special modification.

Google Talk

Sign up for Google Talk here!

Will it change your life? I can't speak for you, but it's already changed mine in its brief, two-day existence.

There are subtle differences between regular phone calls, VoIP, and IM. Phone calls are the most personal, but they also require the most commitment from both parties to a formal conversation, so they usually happen only when there is a purpose. As a result, they might not occur frequently even between very good friends.

Instant messaging can be fairly impersonal by comparison, but because it is such a casual, low-commitment venue, it's easy to maintain connections through frequent (albeit brief) chats that wouldn't otherwise happen via phone. No worries about dead spots in the conversation or having to maintain it for any length of time.

VoIP seems to lie somewhere in the middle. Because it's a live conversation, it's more personal, and you are more committed to it, as opposed to being able to jump in and out of IM chats, but it still has that informal IM feel to it, where you can call someone up simply because you see him/her online and want to say a quick hello.

I've already talked with Russell and Jeremy multiple times in the last two days in situations where we normally would have just IM'd but probably wouldn't have proactively called each other. Google Talk is the happy medium.

Unlike some of our previous new products (Gmail, Maps), this one doesn't make any quantum leaps in service or technology over existing ones (at least not yet). It's not an innovation. It's just a fun and convenient way to combine the personal touch of a phone call with the laid-back nature of IM. And the sound quality is excellent. So get signed up, and give me a ring!

Makapuu Hike

Traci and I hiked up to Makapuu Point where there is a lighthouse and some old bunkers. It was a short hike (~ 2 miles roundtrip), but the pictures were worth it!










Diamond Head is in the far right of the picture.

Really incredible new monitor

Not only is the monitor see-through...it's pass-through, too!


P.S. Thanks for the bat, Eddy. It's exactly what I was looking for, and it can pass through matter. Amazing.

Incredible new monitor

It took three long weeks, but I finally got my new monitor, the 20.1" Dell widescreen. It was well worth the wait. It's essentially the same monitor that Andrew has, so I knew I was getting a great product, and for half off sticker!

They did make one innovative new upgrade from Andrew's version...the see-through desktop! I recommend the monitor just for this.

Welcome to Stanford, Walt

From the August 20, 2005 San Francisco Chronicle:

Three players - senior linebacker Timi Wusu, kicker Michael Sgroi, and cornerback Nick Silvas - will miss practice today because they will be taking the MCAT exam.

"That's not something I've had to deal with much before," Harris said. "I told them I've heard a lot of excuses, but I've never heard that one."

Star Sightings!

Just saw Michelle Wie today at a mall near my house. I was studying with my friend Dean, and she and her friends sat at the bench next to us. Man, is she tall! I can add her to my meager list of celebrity sightings: Kelly Hu, Chelsea Clinton, and Matt Lottich.

By the way, the sky was so clear today that I could see two islands, Molokai and Lanai, from my house. Here's a picture with Molokai in the background.

Red-headed sluts at the strip club

bachelor party (n.) - a party held for a bachelor shortly before he is married, to commemorate his final opportunity to engage in activities of which a new wife might not approve, including gambling, drinking alcohol, and going to a strip club

Check, check, and...check (technically speaking, but we'll get to that later).

Eddy and Stephanie are getting married Labor Day weekend! To celebrate Eddy's last days before the joyous union, best man Russell threw the bachelor party this weekend, a two-day affair down in San Diego for the groom and his wedding party. Jeff unfortunately couldn't make it, but the rest of us were ready to roll.

Curt, Eddy, Russell, Alan, Ben, Jesse, Chang
Del Mar Race Track

The party got started Saturday morning at the Del Mar race track, where Russell had arranged for us to get reserved dining tables in the front row of the grandstand, right near the finish line. The best seats in the house, and quite classy! We ordered a bunch of appetizers, sandwiches, margaritas, and beer, then got down to the business of making money.

Great view of the home stretch...
...from the front row of the reserved table section
I had never bet on horses before, so the old pros - Russell and Alan - showed me the ropes. A quick rundown of our most common bets:

Minimum $2 Bets

• Win - Pick a horse to win
• Place - Pick a horse to finish top two
• Show - Pick a horse to finish top three
• Quinella - Pick the top two horses in either order

Minimum $1 Bets

• Exacta - Pick the top two horses in the correct order
• Trifecta - Pick the top three horses in the correct order
• Pick Three - Pick the winner of three straight races

Recap of the races:

Race #1
I start with a basic $2 win bet on a filly named Kash Klip, and she jumps out to the early lead and manages to just hold on down the stretch. Great start to the day! Since she is one of the betting favorites, I don't win much money ($6), but nobody else in our group hits, so it's enough to put me at the top of the leaderboard. But a couple of Russes are about to make their big move.

Race #2
Picking horses can really be a crapshoot. Where they were bred, by whom they were trained, who their jockey is...all Greek to me. The odds are the most important guide, obviously, but if you just go by the odds, you'll never win much money. You have to have feel, go with your emotions, look for a sign. And as fate would have it on this day, four different races feature a horse with one of our names (or close approximations thereof), and there's no clearer sign than that. This particular race features a thoroughbred named Atta Boy Russ, and we all immediately put $2 win bets on him. Russell puts $3 win, place, and show bets on his namesake, and he also puts in a $1 trifecta and $1 pick three, both with Atta Boy Russ as the winner.

Is there any doubt what happens next? Russ takes the early lead, then wins a three-wide duel down the stretch to make winners of us all, but especially Russell, who gets paid on his win, place, and show bets, but also hits his trifecta for $47 on the $1 bet! And his pick three is still live. New name at the top of both leaderboards, and that name is Russ.

Race #3
This is the first race of the day on the turf (inner track consisting of grass), and word is that Kent Desormeaux, one of the greatest jockies of all time, is an expert on turf, so we all put in $2 win bets for K Girl, the filly that he'll be riding. At this point, Russell realizes that his pick three has horse 4, Ukatabekidding, winning this race, even though he had intended to go with Desormeaux and K Girl. Too late to do anything now but root for horse 4.

Horse 4 makes its move...Ukatabekidding!
I repeat, is there any doubt what happens next? K Girl finishes dead last, and Ukatabekidding loses a physical duel down the stretch to finish second, but wait! A steward's inquiry! The winner, horse 6 Word Girl, is DQ'd for cutting across horse 4, making Ukatabekidding the winner! We all lose money, including Russell, who put money on K Girl to hedge his bet, but much more importantly, his pick three is still alive, with just one race to go for a big payoff.

Race #4
Russell needs horse 6, Itty Bitty Pretty, to win the race for his pick three to hit, and after seeing what happened the last two races, I just know it's going to happen, so I put in a $2 win bet on the rhyming filly, and sure enough, she wins wire to wire. It earns me $7, but it gets Russell $90! On a $1 bet! He's lost most of his Atta Boy Russ earnings by now, but he's still up a whopping $105. I'm down about $10.

Before this race, Eddy and I decide to make $2 quinella bets on the bottom two odds horses, just for the heck of it. Of course they don't hit, but it gets us both thinking a lot more about the longshots...

Race #5
Horse 1, Victory Light, comes in as the longest of longshots for the day, at 46:1, and Eddy and I, completely independent of and unbeknownst to each other, put in $2 win bets on the thoroughbred. Our last longshot bet didn't pan out, but it's only $2, so why not try again?

Go Victory Light! (red #1, green jockey, near)
I'm taking pictures of the stretch run, so when Victory Light crosses the line first, I'm not fully aware of what's happening. I hear Eddy celebrating his winning pick, and everyone is in disbelief about it, so I realize that something big is happening, and it finally dawns on me that my Hail Mary was just caught in the endzone! Official results get posted, and the $2 bet is worth $95!

You think these two guys just won?
We stay for 3 more races, but they are mostly uneventful. The other namesake horses fail miserably. Logician finishes 5th, Up A Creek finishes 10th out of 10 (though it was the longshot...I somehow feel the need to defend this horse), and Dancing Edie finishes 3rd, with Desormeaux on board. Yeah, we realize that Edie is not quite Eddy, but when you're picking horses, you'll latch onto anything even remotely resembling meaningful to help you make your picks. We resort to calling the bachelor Edie for the rest of the night after his pseuodo-namesake fails to help any of us win money.

Russell hits an exacta in the last race for a nice $20 win, and he and I both finish around +$54. Eddy appropriately finishes the day the big winner, up about $60.

Gaslamp Strip Club

Eddy requested no strip clubs for the bachelor weekend, so Russell got us reservations at the double-entendred Gaslamp Strip Club, a restaurant known for its New York strip steaks and attractive (but fully-clothed) waitresses. It's also known for having the patrons grill their own steaks, which is a clever ploy; unique customer experience + no chefs required = $$$.

That's right, Eddy, eyes on the food. Alan...not so much
Who knew cooking your own food could be so fun?
It also = crowds, and despite our reservation, it took us half an hour to get seated. No worries. Mr. Lo tends bar when he isn't engineering vehicle dynamics, so he knew all the good drinks to order while we waited on the patio. Red-headed slut, purple hooter shooter, strip tease...mildly embarrassing to order, but all very tasty. I especially enjoyed the red-headed slut. Alan knows his drinks.

The boys and their red-headed sluts
The food was good, the atmosphere great, and afterwards we headed back to our hotel to cap the night in the vice-presidential suite, to which we were upgraded due to overbookings. It's a wonderful life.

Morley Field Disc Golf

The closing activity of the weekend was a round of frisbee golf at the Morley Field Disc Golf Course, in San Diego. I've played once before, on the Stanford campus with Drew and Lisa, where the targets were fountains and statues, and the tee boxes included the balcony of the Physics Tank, but this place was an actual course specifically made for the purpose. Imagine a shrunken golf course with chained baskets in place of holes. They even had disc rentals with drivers (meant for long distances off the tee) and putters (more stable and easier to control, though at our level, completely pointless).

The disc golf version of a hole
I had the best distance off the tee (years of Ultimate experience paying off), so despite poor "putting", I ended up winning by a handful of strokes throws over Curt and Eddy, who looked good but couldn't avoid the trees.

Eddy launching off the opening tee as Curt looks on
Jesse throwing out of the trees
It was a great way to close out a fun weekend. Russell put together a fantastic schedule of events, I got to see Alan, and most importantly, Eddy had a great time, and won some money to boot. See y'all Labor Day weekend. And Gina's coming!

Greatest season ever

Back when Seinfeld - Season 4 came out on DVD, I pondered where it ranked among the greatest television seasons ever. It's clearly the best that Seinfeld has to offer, with so many memorable episodes: The Contest, The Junior Mint, The Roommate Switch. If I were to list out my ten favorite episodes of the show, over half would come from this one season.

So where does it rank all time, among all shows? Just ahead of the first two seasons of The West Wing and Friends - Season 2 , but short of my #1 seed, The Simpsons - Season 6, which was just released on DVD. Seinfeld - Season 4 had a bubble boy, but The Simpsons - Season 6 had a football in the groin. The ball! His groin! It works on so many levels! Give that show the $10,000.

Of the many things that made The Simpsons so genius during its prime years, the one I appreciated most was the heavy incorporation of pop culture references, and season 6 did it best: Rear Window, The Tell-Tale Heart, JFK, The Shining, The Godfather, Dallas, Star Wars, The Lion King...even Matlock. If you can identify the corresponding episodes, you're genuine class. If not, you're iron. I have a ball. Perhaps you'd like to bounce it.

Season 6 also includes classics like A Star is Burns (the Springfield Film Festival, my favorite episode of any show ever), Itchy & Scratchyland, Homer the Great (the Stonecutters, who made Steve Guttenberg a star), Bart vs. Australia, Lemon of Troy, and Lisa on Ice (ice hockey!). It's no coincidence that my three favorite sitcoms--Seinfeld, The Simpsons, Friends--all had episodes featuring ice hockey.

I'm still waiting for my shipment from Amazon (boo-urns), but when it arrives, Andrew and I are going to enjoy a marathon viewing session, starting with A Star Is Burns. Mmm, beer nuts.

And just a couple of weeks later, I'll be enjoying another show on DVD that has recently joined the pantheon: Lost - Season 1. If you aren't a Loser yet, now's the time to get caught up! Great character backstories, addictive serialized storylines, a Korean couple, and all filmed in various places on Oahu! It doesn't get any better...except in The Simpsons - Season 6, Seinfeld - Season 4, the first two seasons of The West Wing, Friends - Season 2...

History is written by the winners

Official SHHNHB Site

Congrats to Hubert for winning SHHNHB #3 and elevating himself to the #1 ranking! First golf, now hearts. It's been a good week for The Assassin. His reward? The first ever guest blog on Changina.com. It's history in the making, folks. Enjoy!

Also be sure to check out the updates on the official site, including new rankings, photos, nicknames, statistics, and records. But first, read how we got there...

SHHNHB #3 Recap - A New Number One!
by Hubert Pan

No more new trophies, but still plenty of exhilirating hearts action! Once again, a cinderella joined the final table as the visiting Drew shocked by relegating the previous one-seed Chang to the consolation table. I barely survived the other semifinal table to join Drew, Annaka, and Andrew in the championship. Both second round matches turned into relatively comfortable victories, as Chang took out his vengeance on the lower seeds, and I just missed getting assassinated a few times to cruise to victory and finally wrest the top ranking away from Chang!

Semifinal #1 (race to 100, $5 to the winner)
043 - (8) Drew
051 - (4) Andrew
079 - (1) Chang
111 - (5) Lisa

This table started off as expected, as Chang held the advantage through the first 5 hands with Lisa taking some big hands to fall to the back of the pack. Then consecutive brutal hands, including a missed moon shot opportunity, pushed Chang down into 3rd place. To keep the cinderella streak going, Drew held a comfortable lead after 8 hands, with Andrew and Chang within a queen for 2nd place and Lisa trying to hang on. Drew took the heavy points on the next hand to bring the three closer together, but Chang was hit hard on the next one, allowing the Drews to advance as Lisa went over 100 on the next hand. Once again there was a surprise moving onto the finals, defeating the two time defending champ, no less!

Semifinal #2 (race to 100, $5 to the winner)
059 - (2) Hubert
069 - (3) Annaka
078 - (7) Gerald
106 - (6) Rob

The first four hands at this table were relatively normal, as Annaka held the early advantage with the three guys fairly close together. Then Gerald's natural genius took over as he shot the moon off of my pass. I sent him an innocuous 9 of hearts, but he happened to also have A through J and a ton of others. Rob got hammered on the next hand and was precariously close to going over the edge as we headed into the seventh hand. Gerald and Annaka were tied at 33, roughly 20 points ahead of me, so it was looking like the other top seed would get bounced in short order. About midway through the hand, Rob took the queen and was temporarily over the edge. At that point, I held the only card (ace of diamonds) that could stop him from shooting and quickly let that go to ensure his survival. He shot the moon and elected to subtract 26 points from his score, which gave the table some breathing room from a quick end to the round. I held steady for a couple hands while creeping closer to Gerald when we started the tenth hand, with Gerald passing to me. He had already demonstrated some responsibility when he passed me the first time around, which had ruined an otherwise perfect shooting hand. I nonetheless passed away my hearts, and he obliged by completing my hand for a moon shot that allowed me to leapfrog into first and escape the round with a victory.

Consolation (race to 200, $5 to the winner)
047 - (1) Chang
161 - (7) Gerald
190 - (6) Rob
200 - (5) Lisa

Having been bumped from the final table, Chang pretty much dominated this game from end to end, leading through all 19 hands and shooting twice in the process. The others shared being on the receiving end of it as he finished over 100 points ahead of every other person at the table, a record for margin of victory. By taking care of business, he also maintained his overall money lead on me. We have both won two championships and two semifinal tables.

Championship (race to 200, $25 to the winner)
023 - (2) Hubert
101 - (3) Annaka
117 - (4) Andrew
201 - (8) Drew

True to form, the results at the final table followed the seedings and the cinderella once again set the pace to 200. However, in stark contrast to previous tables, rather than repeated assassinations of the leader, I managed to grab the lead early in this one and carry it through until the end. I guess since I'm The Asssasin and Chang wasn't in first for me to hit, I turned my attention elsewhere and managed to also wriggle free unscathed.

The first three hands were textbook for me, as I managed to either drop the queen of spades myself or expose weaknesses in others' hands and force them to eat it. Three hands down, each of the other three had taken the queen once. I guess I'm just a generous guy and wanted to make sure everyone shared. :) To add insult to injury, in each occurrence, the person who took the queen also had the option of playing under but decided to risk it.

Andrew then went on to pull off miracle after miracle, taking virtually no points for 6 consecutive hands despite having some atrocious cards, often at the expense of our guest, Drew, who was repeatedly stuck with high cards near the end and forced to eat the remainder of the points. After holding out for so long and remaining within 20 points of me, Andrew finally took a couple bad hands and started falling back. After Drew took another bad hand and was nearing the end, it seemed inevitable that I would walk away with the trophy.

It was one of those days where I either had the bottom cards of suits, managed to void my suits, had plenty of spades whenever I had the queen, or had a really bad hand but also had the queen, so I managed to escape the big damage. Near the end of the game, the best opportunity to hurt me finally arose. It was a right pass, and Annaka voided her clubs by passing me a couple high ones. After hearts had been broken and another dropped, it was the second trick of hearts, and I had the option of ducking with the 3 or taking it with one of my remaining three high hearts. I almost decided to take it and try playing back with the 3 until I realized the only other heart was the 2. Realizing I was in deep trouble, I still ducked this one. Luckily for me, the next three tricks were led spades and diamonds which allowed me to get rid of all three hearts. Andrew had control, and I had a bad feeling Annaka was saving the queen for me. At this point, I had three clubs left: 3, 6, and 10. Andrew led the 5, I played the 3, Annaka passed, and Drew thankfully showed his 4, leaving my 6 as the new low card. Andrew then played the 7 and I was pretty sure that he had another one, so even if I ducked this one, I'd take it on the last trick. I thought hard about it, but realized there wasn't really much to do. Resigned to taking the queen eventually, I said, "Oh well, I guess I'm taking it," but just ducked in case I had miscounted and he didn't have anymore clubs. As I was playing my card, Annaka simultaneously tossed out the queen with glee, only to realize I had ducked and she instead had hit poor Andrew. The card was played so there was nothing else to do, and I did indeed take the last trick when Andrew led his 8 of clubs to my 10, but I don't know how I dodged it on that one. If the game had been closer, there may have been arguing about it, but since it was almost over, we were able to laugh about it (probably me more so than anyone else).

In the aftermath of that hand, Drew (who like Gerald in my semifinal had demonstrated responsibility early when I took a chance on the first pass) passed me three diamonds when I voided hearts. I promptly laid low, fished out the high cards I wanted to see, and then shot to win for the 2nd time of the evening.

It was a night of firsts, mostly for me :) My first outright championship victory, the first wire-to-wire championship table win, the first championship table win without taking the queen, the first moon shot at the championship table, the first championship table to have a margin of victory of more than 1 point, and the first change at the top of the rankings. Annaka continued her steady strong performance while Andrew continued to be the best player to not have won any money.

The money breakdown for the night:

1. Hubert - $30.00
2. Chang - $5.00
2. Drew - $5.00

Three of the top four seeds have made the final table each time, and I'm the only one to not have been bumped out, so I'm wary of my turn coming next. The semifinals this time around were wakeup call enough that anything could happen! Once again the trophy will remain in our house, but it is only a matter of time before someone takes it from the house...or is it? Come out for round 4 next month and we shall see!

A Good Walk Spoiled?

So apparently I have a pretty good-looking golf swing (pictures below). Unfortunately, it doesn't result in that many good-looking golf shots. Form over function. Sad.

I've always been good at mimicking the form of professional athletes. I've never received formal lessons in any sport. I just copy what I see on television, and usually the results are decent. But golf...golf is a different beast all together.

This Friday, my housemates and I hit the Shoreline Links for a twilight tee time. Ten bucks, 6pm, enough time to get through the front nine before sundown. We were joined by Lisa, who took the photos throughout the round, and Drew, who is in town for the weekend. The two of them didn't play, but they may have enjoyed the beautiful Shoreline setting more than the players, because as the saying goes, golf is a good walk spoiled. But we were naive. Look how happy we look on the first tee:



Other than after a few intermittent moments of brilliance (most by Hubert), the smiling stopped there. Countless lost balls, shanked drives, fat wedges, thin pitches, yipped putts. And only one of us (again, Hubert) managed a score through 9 that matched the PGA record for 18 (59 strokes).

Yet through it all, I actually had a blast! The funny thing about golf, at least for me, is that I can play like crap for most of the day, but if I manage just one big highlight moment, it's more than enough to carry me through the crap and leave me happy.

That moment last night came on the fourth hole, a 135-yard par-3 over water. This should be a 6- or 7-iron off the tee, but my malfunctioning swing barely manages that with a driver, so that's what I pulled from my bag. Now, if you don't know much about golf, it's really sad that I'd be pulling out driver on a par-3, but whatever it takes, right? At least it was into the wind. We were staring into the sun, and the glare off the water was harsh, so when I took my swing, I knew I hit a solid shot, but I couldn't follow it! It looked like it landed in the front trap (the only shot in our group to clear the water), but when we got there, it was actually sitting on the green about 15 feet from the hole! A legitimate chance at my first regulation birdie ever, but I ended up lagging it close for an easy par, the first of two on the day for our foursome (the other by, you guessed it, Hpan).

I managed a few other highlights on the day, including some solid drives splitting the fairway (one for 180 yards with a tailwind), and on the final hole (a par-5) I got on in four, leaving me with my second putt for par (I missed). Looking at the pictures of my swing, I wonder where all those errant shots came from, but that's the mystery of golf. Something that lessons will help fix, hopefully. Thanks for taking some great pics, Lis!





And the finish...


Golf obviously can be a frustrating game, but the highs are addictive, and I'm hooked. I look forward to taking lessons, gaining some consistency, and taking down Hubert for the number one seed. Did I mention he had some awesome shots? Check out his blog for the recap of the round and some photos of the other guys' swings. When's the next round?

SHHNHB Threepeat?

SHHNHB Official Site

Like Matt Leinart, I am back for a shot at an unprecedented third consecutive championship (unlike him, I did not have the option to go pro for millions of dollars). This Saturday, August 13, at 8pm, we will find out if I can pull off the historic threepeat, Hubert can match my repeat, or someone new can break through for their initial...peat. Six of the top seven seeds are fired up and ready to go, so the competition will be stiff. Annaka seems especially feisty these days, and she is ready to drop her ladyship without compunction, so watch out!

We only have one SHHNHB virgin this time around. Drew's visit to Casa CHAnG fortuitously coincides with the tournament and gives us our 12th different entrant. Only five of us have made it for all three: myself, Hubert, Annaka, Andrew, and Rob. The full lineup, broken out by semifinal tables, is as follows:

Semifinal 1	Semifinal 2
1. Chang	2. Hubert
4. Andrew	3. Annaka
5. Lisa	6. Rob
8. Drew	7. Gerald

The few ranking changes we've seen since their inception have primarily been swaps between positions that face each other in the semifinals anyway (Hubert/Annaka at the 2/3, Andrew/Lisa at the 4/5), so these groupings once again bring together familiar faces. Hubert, Annaka, and Rob will be meeting for the third straight time in Semifinal #2, and they'll be joined by Gerald, aka Genius (not The Genius, just Genius).

--Side note: we need nicknames for everyone. Suggestions are welcomed.--
At the other table, Andrew and I are facing off in the semis for the third time as well (fourth overall), and we'll be joined by Drew and reunited with Lisa, who missed the last tournament due to work travel (but was ably replaced by her little bro Jeff).

If past results are an indicator (and let's hope they are), there is certain to be one (and only one) cinderella at the final table. Daniel and Jeff have both pulled off the feat; who will it be this time? Will Genius's natural talent finally close the deal for him after coming within a queen of the first final table? Will Rob break out of his semifinal schnide and take out Hubert or Annaka? Or will the wildcard Drew make a surprise run from the bottom of the rankings?

As long as we are using past results as our indicator, the answer is, it doesn't really matter. I'm gonna win, and maybe Hubert will manage to tie me. Unless I'm wrong, and I'm never wrong, they are headed straight into the fire swamp! the rest of y'all are playing for the consolation prize. If it is otherwise, I shall be very put out.

World's Best Athlete

Bryan Clay won the decathlon at the World Championships in Helsinki yesterday! Although he was born in Texas, he grew up in Hawaii. I read one article that called him a Texas native, but he calls Hawaii his hometown... it must have been a Texan writer. Bryan is also half Japanese and half African American! Two good combinations... Hawaii and Japanese :) See, we do have good athletes even though we're relatively short!

Fantasies do come true

Well, almost. For instance, my fantasy is to be a sports team GM. Instead, I'm a GM for a fantasy sports team. That'll have to do...for now.

The NFL season is fast approaching, which means draft time for our annual head-to-head fantasy football league, now entering its third illustrious year! There's one big change this year, and it's a sad one. Drew has decided to hang up his salary cap and call it quits. And this coming on the heels of a runner-up finish and best regular-season record last year. Boo-urns.

In his place will be Hubert, while the rest of the gang remains the same: Jeremy, Gina, DanFran, Lisa, Scott, Andrew, and myself.

For those not familiar with fantasy football, this is the simple construct: each GM drafts a team of actual NFL players, and you get points for the yards, touchdowns, etc., that your players accrue (you also lose points for fumbles, interceptions, etc.). Each week your team goes head-to-head against another (thus a head-to-head league), and the team with the most points wins that game. At the end of the season, the top four teams by record make it to the playoffs to determine the champion (the bottom four teams have a consolation bracket, much like in SHHNHB).

The final standings from the past two years were as follows:

Season 1	Season 2
1. Scott	1. Chang
2. Chang	2. Drew
3. DanFran	3. Jeremy
4. Jeremy	4. Gina
5. Gina	5. DanFran
6. Lisa	6. Lisa
7. Andrew	7. Scott
8. Drew	8. Andrew

The draft for this season will be held on Saturday, August 27th (time is TBD), and the order is based on reverse standings from last year:

1. Andrew

2. Scott

3. Lisa

4. DanFran

5. Gina

6. Jeremy

7. Hubert

8. Chang

To assuage anyone's concerns and dispel any myths about the relative merits of each draft position, the four finalists in the history of our league drafted in 1st, 5th, 7th, and 8th position. Anyone can win.

If you are a GM, sign up now!

League ID: 377717
League Name: They Speak English In What?
Password: stanford

If you are not, just sit back and enjoy the periodic updates throughout the season (they are pretty in-depth, as the other GM's can attest), starting with my blowout preview, immediately following the draft.

And root for a repeat! Everybody loves dynasties, right?

Dean-o's Wedding

One of my best friends in med school, Dean Fraser, just got married tonight! He's one of the funniest and most off-the-wall guys I know. And he lives just three blocks from me. I give him credit for somehow snagging a Stanford grad (but she did go to Punahou, my rival high school). His wedding was at the Kahala Mandarin, where Chang and I may have ours, and Dean's wife already told me that she'll give me helpful tips and such. Can't wait! And congrats to the new happy couple!

The ceremony at the Koko Head Gazebo


Traci, Ashley, and Lauren in front of the movie poster


Table full of med students and significant others


The man of the hour and me


Med students with the happy couple!

New site features

How best to motivate someone to keep up with his workouts? Penalize him $5 each time he misses one, for starters. Money always works, right? But as Levitt taught us in Freakonomics, monetary penalties also allow people to buy off their guilt. They subsititute an economic incentive for a moral one, oftentimes resulting in the opposite effect of the one that was intended.

So you add the element of peer pressure, and on a large scale. That's the idea behind the workout chart, designed to give all of you an inside look at our respective commitments to the routine. Not only does it show who's been making and missing workouts and how much each of us has accrued in penalties, it also includes a chat box for you all to use to encourage, or more likely ridicule, each of us as you track our progress. Feel free to check in as often as you'd like and drop us a line.

We've decided to wipe the slate clean, which really only affects Hubert, but starting today, any missed workout means $5 in the penalty jar, and maybe some barbs from the peanut gallery. :)

I also added a chat box, as well as a few other new features, to the SHHNHB page, so check it out. SHHNHB #3 tentatively scheduled for next week! Drew, you gonna be in town for it?

What in the world is Ice Nuts?

This addendum to the previous post is in response to a handful of questions I've received about Ice Nuts, to which I've made quite a few references in the past.

First some background. Our house in Belmont had a large, rectangular living room with very little furniture, and what furniture it did contain was relegated to the perimeter, shoved against the walls. This created a lot of open space, which we liked to use to hit the volleyball around. Indoor pepper, basically. But being the fun-loving competitors that we were, the peppering quickly evolved into a game, and Ice Nuts was born.

The way the game works is, you get a group of 5 guys spread out evenly on the floor of a big spacious living room (ours was perfect), and you bat a volleyball around at each other at high speeds, with no rules governing how you hit the ball. Punch it, kick it, head butt it, bounce it off the wall...whatever. Just don't let it hit the floor, because when it does, each player immediately points at the person whose fault they think it is. Whoever gets the most votes gets a point, and the first to 15 points has to melt a cube of ice on his nuts. Thus the name.

The thing is, when I mis-hit the ball, for instance, it's not like the other four guys would quietly say, "Um, I think that was on Chang." "Yeah, that one was Chang's." "Okay, one point for Chang. Next round." No no no. It's all much more humiliating than that. A volleyball smacks you in the face and drops to the ground, and four guys immediately jump up and vehemently point at you repeatedly, laughing and screaming, "YOU! YOU! HAAAAH! YOU!" Fill in all the inappropriate comments that Jason's imagination cooked up (but that I would never include here). Trash-talking was integral to the game - second in importance only to a very thick skin - and no one could hold Jason's jock in that regard.

And the punishment...

Simply put, the game was degrading.

So it comes as no surprise that the only one of us to ever get to the punishment phase was Drew, the most laid-back and easy-going of the group. When he lost the inaugural game, he took it like a man, went to the freezer, and did the deed.

Whenever any of the rest of us (myself, Scott, Jason, and Jason's former volleyball teammate Shane) threatened 15 points, tempers would inevitably flare and arguments would break out to the point where we'd have to abort. This was especially the case when we changed the game to Icy Hot Nuts. Need I say more?

We ended up starting about four games, with the first one being the only one that ever was completed. After the last failed attempt, we finally decided to abandon the game all together, to save our sanities, our friendships, our big bay window...oops, too late for that one. We never did get our deposit back on that house...

Some old new faces

Time to welcome some new faces to the blog ring! For most of you, these faces are actually old (really old in Scott's case...he's 29...but what a pretty boy). I lived with Drew and Scott at Stanford for two years each, then for another year up in Belmont after graduation. That was a fun house, in many ways similar to the one in which I now live. But then they ditched me for SoCal, and took Ice Nuts with 'em. Now all I have left is their blogs.


Drew actually hates the idea of blogs, but he's always been one to give things a try, and it's in that spirit that he has joined the party. How long he'll last, no one knows. One time I gave him an Orange Cream Saver, and it was in his mouth for about three seconds before he spit it out (but he did try it, even though he knew he'd hate it). Let's hope his blogging days last longer, because he has a unique voice and entertaining writing style, and we can always use more bloggers who are passionate about sports, and hockey in particular (a Mexican who's passionate about hockey...that's funny).

Scott actually started his blog about a year ago, and he's been averaging as many posts in a year as Byung Hyun Kim has base hits. But I've been assured that new content is on the way, and hopefully with the option to add comments, because we'll have plenty for him if his first two posts are any indication. They are both brilliant, albeit widely divergent in length and theme (to put it mildly). And it's about time we added some right-wing blood to this party...not that I want to pigeon-hole him or anything. :) Just no posts about the stupid Spurs, please.

Two new blogs to read...procrastinating at work just keeps getting better. Now if only DrewYay.com would finally launch...

P.S. Speaking of my Belmont housemates, I would love to see Jason start blogging, too. I can't imagine what he would concoct. The guy makes lettuce funny.

The Electric Slide

I've been to a lot of high school dances where they play the Electric Slide song, and everyone does the cowboy-like movements to the song. For some reason, I never really learned it too well. Only yesterday did I learn how to dance it like a pro...from an elderly Filipino man! For two weeks, I am working at the Kokua Kalihi Valley Center, which is a huge conglomerate of medical, community, dental, and many other services in a relatively impoverished area in Honolulu. On Mondays, I do home care visits with a geriatrician. On Tuesdays, I see geriatric patients in the clinic. And on Wednesdays, I attend elderly exercise groups in which I mingle and give a talk about nutrition. Yesterday, I went to a Filipino-dominant group. It was so cute! Everyone comes early to get their blood pressure taken and dance. Thus, a man, probably in his 70s, showed me how to do the electric slide! Finally! There was even a 90-something-year-old woman there! For exercise, they do lots of aerobic movements while sitting in a chair. My talk followed and went uneventfully (a man shared about having kidney stones from drinking a lot of milk on a hot day and not using the bathroom). Then it was time for lunch, courtesy of Meals on Wheels! Since I had the "ins", I ate some Filipino food that some of the volunteers had cooked (yummy! my college roomie Cheryl would have been proud).

I think that this elderly exercise program is terrific and is a great way for them to get exercise, eat a healthy meal, and socialize. It's surprising how much a person can deteriorate both mentally and physically with social isolation and staying at home all day.

Law firms get the best seats

I went to the Giants/Rockies game with Lisa, Jeff, and their father last night, courtesy of the firm that Lisa worked for this summer (Friday's her last day!), and the seats were incredible! The game, unfortunately, was not. The Giants blow, they find new, inventive ways to lose (catcher interference...wow), and most importantly, no Barry. So the night was about appreciating the great seats, eating garlic fries, watching my cousin Byung Hyun Kim pitch (what? he could be...), and hoping to catch a foul ball (was in the vicinity of a few, but no luck). I've caught one fly ball in my life, at a College World Series game at Sunken Diamond. It was a cool moment, but it passed quickly. I gave the ball to a kid.

Here's me and Lis in our seats, second row, field level, right next to the Rockies dugout and first base:


The classic ballpark dinner (Gina would want nothing to do with me after this mass of garlic and onions...I'm still feeling them, a full day later):


Seeing my name on the jumbotron line-up was very cool! Seeing the .000 average for the guy on deck was not:


But then a miracle! Byung Hyun got his first base hit of the season! That brings the total number of base hits in the majors by a Kim to...one, which is exactly how many highlights this game had:


I certainly appreciated being invited to the game (thanks, Lis!), and I really enjoyed sitting so close to the action (thanks, Lis' firm!), but baseball is not the most exciting spectator sport, especially when the best player of our generation is on the DL and the team stinks. So I'm counting down the days until hockey season starts. There is no better sport to watch in person than hockey. Who wants to hit the Shark Tank with me for a few games? According to Drew, only 70 days till Opening Night!

Hans and Franz and Hans and Franz

I have a hard time staying motivated when it comes to working out with weights. If I work out regularly, I gain some muscle, but not much. If I don't work out at all, I lose some muscle, but not much, and it only takes me a few weeks back on the wagon to gain back what I lost anyway. My weight doesn't fluctuate either way, since I stay active with sports, eat healthy, and have a crazy-fast metabolism (almost as fast as Hubert's). I'm basically a skinny dude who's gonna stay skinny no matter what I do. So why bother? It's the law of diminishing returns.

That being said, I still find myself motivated in stretches. And it's all home workout stuff that I can do during the time I'd be spending on my ass watching TV anyway, so I might as well be productive. My workout currently consists of pushups, situps, lateral and front raises, and curls, takes less than an hour to complete, and is done every other day. Quick to do, easy on the joints, requires very little equipment (just some dumbbells), and all done while watching The Daily Show or Sportscenter. Perfect.

And it just got better! I've managed to turn it into a house activity, despite the lack of competition or trash-talking (well...some trash-talking...it is us, after all). Gerald was the easiest to convince, and we worked out together once last week. Then Andrew said he was up for it this Monday, and I figured I'd get Hubert to join us and round out the group. Andrew's response to that idea: "Haha, good one." But Hubert said yes!

Monday was our first day, and there were some struggles, but we all got through it, and the commitment is now there to keep it going. Gerald had the idea of a penalty jar for each time we missed a workout, and the money would go toward another house toy. I'm all for it. Five bucks per missed day. We'll have that rod hockey table I've had my eye on in a matter of weeks!

Speaking of house toys, it is Gerald's turn to buy one, as I mentioned before, and as nice as a stripper/tetherball pole would look in our house, it looks like he's going for the horizontal version: a pullup bar. Time to build some wings!

Any guesses on who will be the first to miss a day? Today's our next scheduled workout, and I'm going to the Giants game, but I'll get my work in afterwards, no matter how late it is. Gotta work off those garlic fries!

P.S. My money's on Hubert. :)

A heartless game

What happens when you put four intense Hearts players together at a table with a deck of cards, a round of rootbeer floats, and a previously viewed movie playing in the background? Hard feelings, quick tempers, assassinations, fencing, fighting, torture, giants, monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles...

...and a really good game of Hearts.

Doesn't sound too bad. I'll try to stay awake.

Oh, well, thank you very much, very nice of you. Your vote of confidence is overwhelming.

Annaka came over Saturday night, armed with the aformentioned floats, and since it was just the four top SHH seeds together, and the four of us had never met at the final table, we decided to play a 200-point game of Hearts. As is customary, I threw on a movie, the classic Hudson Hawk, but I was the only one who had seen it (can you believe it, Drew?), and two hands into this thing, it was clear that no one was going to be paying any attention to the movie, so we switched to The Bourne Supremacy, a movie we could all easily ignore (then what's the point, you ask? ambient noise, I suppose, or tradition).

It was pretty clear we all wanted to win badly. Fishing the queen, passing her bare, not taking one for the team...nothing was off limits. The leader was regularly assassinated to bring balance back to the game. Every hand was followed up with in-depth analysis. There was constant second-guessing (and cursing) whenever someone made a bad play. At the 150-point mark, halfway through the second movie (The Thomas Crowne Affair), we were all separated by an amazingly miniscule eight points. It was probably the most competitive game in which I've ever played.

On the last hand, Annaka misplayed a trick that allowed me to avoid three hearts and the queen (which Hubert was waiting to dump on me), and I ended up beating her by 14 points. It was that kind of game. But in the end, the outcome was secondary to the sub-plots that developed during the game:

• During one stretch, Andrew went five hands in a row without scoring a point, but he was still in last place, about 15 points behind the rest of us. I made a dig that it's easy to go unnoticed when the rest of us are busy assassinating each other, and he rebutted that he actually had good hands and wasn't going to take points anyway. So on the next hand, Hubert passed me the queen, and I passed up opportunities to dump her on him and Annaka, and when Andrew finally showed weakness, I gave him his prize. It was a pretty ruthless move considering both Hubert and Annaka were closer to me in score (Hubert was leading at the time), but I wasn't going to let Andrew go six straight scoreless. He's not Roger Clemens.
  
  
• On one memorable hand, Andrew passed Annaka a bare queen, then went on to fish her out. Still steaming from the cutthroat move, Annaka returned the favor a few hands later, emphatically slapping down her spade to fish out Andrew's queen. It was the angriest I'd ever seen her! Her comment: "What can I say, I hold a grudge." Don't we all, at least when we play Hearts.
  
  
• Hubert took a break at the 100-point mark, so we decided to mess with him by rigging the deck. It didn't hurt that he was holding a healthy lead at the time, so he deserved it. But since we always rig the deck whenever anyone leaves for a long enough period of time, we decided to be a little more tricky (it's too obvious when someone comes back and you immediately start dealing). We took two identical decks, then rigged one of them and hid it in my lap, where it would get switched with the deck that I just shuffled in front of him. But we figured he might even see that coming, so we rigged a third identical deck, so that after he called us on the first rigging, we'd have a second one ready to go. Not ones for subtlety, we had made the rigged hands too obvious, and my sleight of hand was pretty poor, too, so our master plan didn't get very far.
  
  But when we actually played the next hand, we were able to assassinate Hubert when he unknowingly led a trick with the last heart (a rare mistake). Andrew didn't know it was the last one, either, but he knew it was the lowest one, so when he dumped the queen, he apologized to me, since I was the only other person to play a heart on the previous heart trick. Luckily I was void, and Hubert ate it.

We're all friends again, but man, during those four hours (yes, four hours), it was war, and we didn't like each other much.

Can't wait to do it again!

He's on fire!

This past Sunday, Andrew cleared out some space in the back room and bought the indoor hoop! The progression from messy storage room to cool game room has begun!


We kicked things off with two games of HPAN with me, Andrew, and Hubert. Ayeh's long-distance sharp-shooting helped him win round one, and no one could match my wacky shots in round 2. Hubert could only manage two second-place finishes in the game that was named after him.

Naturally, we followed that up with a game that Andrew and I invented (we really should write a book). Two people shoot at the hoop simultaneously from opposite elbows, and you get points for every shot you make while on fire. As everyone knows, you get on fire by making three shots without your opponent making any in that sequence. Andrew and I were both hitting at a good clip, so it was rare for either of us to let the other get on fire, let alone hit a fourth in a row, but Ayeh finally pulled it off, and we called it quits.

So what's next? I bought the dartboard, Ayeh bought the hoop...Hubert is getting a grasscourt volleyball net...so I guess that makes it Gerald's turn to add to the glorification of our house. What do you have in store for us, Gerald?